


Beaten

by TetrodotoxinB



Series: Whumptober 2019 [28]
Category: MacGyver (TV 2016)
Genre: Day 28, Dysfunctional Family, James was an absolute piece of shit and you'll never convince me otherwise, Past Child Abuse, Prompt: Beaten, Whumptober 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2019-10-28
Packaged: 2021-01-05 11:31:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21207827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TetrodotoxinB/pseuds/TetrodotoxinB
Summary: A long overdue conversation.





	Beaten

**Author's Note:**

> Beta'd by [Secret_Library98](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Secret_Library98/pseuds/Secret_Library98).

"Oh come on, Mac," Jack says. "He's your dad. You only get one. Just give him a chance."

Mac glares at Jack but doesn't say anything. There are some things that Jack doesn't know, and maybe, after Jack’s family happy Leave It To Beaver childhood, he just doesn't want to consider any other possibilities. But Mac doesn't have the energy to break it down for him. It's easier just to meet James for lunch. After all, he doesn't have to do it twice.

*****

"I'm really glad you decided to join me," James says as Mac sits.

"It was Jack's idea," Mac says flatly. 

James pushes the plate of onion rings across the table. "I guess it's time he got a raise," he comments with a chuckle. Mac hates the idea this meeting is just another way James has manipulated his life and the people he loves.

"So tell me what you've been up to lately," James requests.

Mac picks at his burger but doesn't eat. "I'm sure you've seen the mission reports. You tell me."

"I meant outside of work. Do you have hobbies? Have you read a good book lately? Is there a special someone?"

Mac rolls his eyes and begins stacking his fries into a pyramid. "You know who all of my friends are. They work for you."

"Angus, if you didn't want to talk to me, then why did you come?" James says. Mac sees the disappointment on James' face, like Mac has failed at yet another task. 

"I came because you won't leave it alone. You rope my friends into our dysfunctional relationship with lies about how much you missed me and how much you care. But if you had really cared you never would have left. You never would have stayed hidden once I started working for you. There was no reason to keep your distance — we work in the same place!" Mac accuses quietly. 

James' face contorts in anger and Mac nearly cringes, the old remembered fear making his stomach roll. 

"Are you going to hold that against me forever?" James demands.

"I don't know. Are you ever going to stop justifying your actions?" Mac shoots back.

James scowls. "I spent so much time with you as a little boy. Have you forgotten the photophone? The emergency beacon? The coil gun? I built those with you. We had fun!"

Mac shakes his head. "No, _you_ had fun. I had to spend my free time in the garage with you learning math, physics, and chemistry. When my friends were out playing, you quizzed me on thermodynamics and organic chemistry. You made me repeat experiments and projects until I got every bit right from memory. And if I ever lost my temper, which happened because I was six or seven, what did you do then? Do you remember?"

James looks at Mac with rage, but doesn’t answer, at least not before Mac goes on.

"No? You don't remember?" Mac asks. "Let me jog your memory. I lost play time, toys — which you already hated to begin with, and if those things didn't magically turn me into a perfect little scientist, you hit me."

"You had a temper, Angus. All parents spanked their kids when you were growing up. And it made you more respectful, taught you to control your temper," James argues back.

"No, it taught me that all that mattered was what you wanted. I never stopped getting upset or frustrated or angry, I just learned not to let you see it. I didn't learn how to handle any of it until I was in the Army because all you taught me was how to internalize it."

James opens his mouth, clearly about to argue this point too, but Mac's been holding onto this hurt for nearly twenty years and he's going to get it out.

"And to be clear, you didn't spank me. You beat me. You left bruises almost every time you hit me, even when it wasn't your belt."

"Angus, you're blowing all of that way out of proportion. You're fair-skinned. That doesn't mean it was abuse," James says condescendingly.

A small part of Mac that's left over from his childhood wants to recoil in case James decides to slap him, maybe even apologize. God only knows what James would have done to him if he spoke like this as a child. But Mac’s been through worse and he's not backing down from James anymore. He knows that just because he feels six years old and scared doesn’t mean he is, and this time he’s taking the stand he never could before. It's over. All of it. 

"See? You just can't help yourself. You have an excuse for everything you do and everything you did. You'll never change. Just don't call me anymore. Don't try to get my friends to talk me into patching things up. Just stay out of my life. We're done, James. We were done long before you ever left."

Mac stands and throws a twenty on the table. "Enjoy your lunch."

As he turns to go, a weight lifts off of Mac. James can't hurt him anymore. Mac can get on with his life knowing that none of this was ever his fault.

*****

Bozer’s gone to the store for more rotel dip while Mac and Jack watch Elvira and drink beers.

"So, uh, how was lunch with the old man?"

Mac sighs and looks down at the beer in his hands. He knew this conversation was inevitable but he’s still not ready to have it.

"I don't think we're gonna be able to work it out. I asked him not to contact me again," Mac explains softly. He knows how much family matters to Jack and how much he wants for Mac to be able to resolve things. Mac knows that Jack just wants him to have what he had with his dad, but even so, the thought of Jack pressing him to try again is exhausting.

"I'm sorry to hear that. I know this was a hard choice and I'm sure you have your reasons," Jack replies. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

Mac's never really talked about it with anyone. Bozer knows only because he saw the bruises when they were kids, when Bozer's grandma would put warm washcloths on his arms or the backs of his thighs. Pena never asked but he knew, and that knowing was part of how he helped Mac learn to manage his emotions in the first place. Even so, it wasn't something either Bozer or Pena openly talked about, isn't something Mac has ever trusted anyone with. But with James finally in his rearview mirror, it might be time.

"Not tonight," Mac finally says. "But soon."

Jack slings an arm over Mac's shoulders and pulls him close. "Whenever you're ready, hoss."

"Thanks, Jack," Mac says, and he means it. Because even without James, Mac already has all the family he needs.


End file.
